Giving Roger His Happy Ending
by live2tivo
Summary: preRENT. April has a strange dream and decides to give Roger and Mark a chance at a happy ending. Written for speedrent 142. First posted story. Be kind, review.


**Title**: Giving Roger His Happy Ending  
**Author**: MusicalJunkie  
**Feedback**: Is like babysitting when the kids are asleep and still getting $8/hour.  
**Pairing**: Implied Mark/Roger. Slight Mark/Maureen & Roger/April.  
**Word Count**: 1425 (I can't believe it's actually over 1000 words)  
**Rating**: PG/ PG-13. You decide. I don't think it's that bad, but RENT in and of itself is PG-13 if not R. However, this is a pretty tame story.  
**Genre**: Romance/Drama (I guess, I'm not sire if this is drama or angst. Both of which I try to avoid, but the prompt kind of dictated the genre)  
**Summary**: preRENT. April has a strange dream and decides to give Roger and Mark a chance at a happy ending  
**Notes**: Hehe. Never posted a fic of any kind before. This is fun. Also, wrote this while babysitting three little bilingual (English and Dutch) children, all under the age of 6. If it seems a little frazzled, it's probably due to the circumstances under which it was written. Luckily, I got home in time to watch the _Everwood_ Series Finale, and type this up (which took less time than I thought it would)  
**Special Thanks**: To Rachel, my RENThead friend, without which I would not have the OBC or Movie soundtracks (or at least not for free) or Anthony Rapp's book (does this count as a thank you card?)  
**Spoilers:** If you're reading RENTdom, I doubt there's any need to worry about spoiling anything.  
**Warnings:** Don't eat yellow snow.  
**Disclaimer**: I don't own RENT. (Well, I own the movie, but not the rights) I don't even own the soundtracks, I borrowed them from Rachel, 'cause they're, like, $30 each.

_"I'm sorry I didn't give you a happy ending, I know I stole that from you" BKLYN___

April loved Roger, but he didn't love her like that and she knew it. He was in love with someone else and hadn't even noticed. She would have said something, but April was selfish, she wanted Roger for herself, so she pretended not to care. That was until Mark brought Maureen home. She tried to ignore the look of jealousy when Mark kissed Maureen, but found it impossible.  
That night, as she slept in Roger's arms, April had the strangest dream she'd ever experienced.__

_She was sitting in a white room watching a film of her life. She saw the first time she saw Roger, when the Well Hungarians played at the Pyramid Club. She saw herself working her way through the crowd after their set so she could meet that guitarist she'd been eyeing. She saw herself and Roger talking over beer and fries at the Life. She saw a few more scenes of herself and Roger alone. Roger playing songs for her on his guitar, them walking through Central Park together, and a few more meals at the Life Café. __  
__Then came the parts that were hard to watch. All the times when she was at the loft with Roger and Mark. She saw herself watching, unnoticed, as they wrestled over the last cookie countless times (Roger would always win, but end up giving half, if not all, of the cookie to Mark, anyway),as Mark watched Roger play "Musetta's Waltz" over and over, encouraging him to keep going even when he messed up (which he seemed to do quite often. It was a simple song, but Roger could never seem to get it right), as Mark tried to write a screenplay with Roger reading over his shoulder making Mark mad by suggesting what he should write next (which were usually rather crude). And then she saw herself watching Roger's jealous expression, again, from when Mark brought Maureen to the loft. __  
__That was the last of the familiar scenes. April couldn't remember doing _anything_ like what she saw next. She was handing money over to a shadowy man. "So, first timer, huh?" the man said.__  
__"Yeah, any advice" __  
__The Man told her exactly how to find a vein and how to load the syringe. She nodded along with everything The Man said. "So, why are you doing this?" The April watching this happen was surprised. Dealers weren't supposed to care.__  
__She heard herself replying "My boyfriend doesn't realized he's in love with his best friend and I can't take it anymore."__  
__"So you've turned to smack? Why not just break up with him?"__  
__"Why do you care so much? You're practically turning down a new customer." __  
__But April never had a chance to find out why The Man was asking so many questions. The scene changed to her shooting up in an alley, and then to her showing Roger how to shoot up. April didn't want to see anymore. She didn't want to think she could ever give Roger drugs. That she could ever make the man she loved a junkie, even if he didn't love her back. __  
__Nothing could've prepared her for the two scenes that followed. The first one was of herself going to the doctor, alone, receiving a slip of paper declaring that she was HIV+. The next has her, sitting in the bathroom, razor on the counter, trying to find the right words to fill the blank piece of paper in front of her. "Roger, I'm sorry I didn't give you a happy ending. I know I stole that from you, but..." She crossed it out. There were no words to describe how sorry she was and why she needed to do this. "Roger, Don't dwell on me, on this. This is what I had to do. Get clean, write songs, and just live. And, Roger, tell Mark how you..." Once again she crossed out what she had written. The April watching the scene couldn't believe what was eventually written on the paper, "Roger, we've got AIDS. Love, April" The razor was two inches from the skin, when April finally woke up.___

She knew then what she had to do. She didn't know if what she had seen in the dream was going to happen, but she did know that she had considered doing smack to ease the pain of Roger's denial. She remembered the note, and knew she never wanted to write it. She loved Roger too much. She didn't want him to become a junkie. She didn't want to give him AIDS. She didn't want to take away his happy ending_. 'I need to talk to Maureen.' ___

It was a long shot, asking Maureen for help, but April wanted to make sure Maureen knew what was going on. April asked Maureen to meet her at the Life Café for lunch. Maureen was a little confused, but she agreed to come.

"Okay, what did you want to talk about?"  
"I know you've only been dating Mark for a little while, but there's something you should know about him."  
"What? He's not HIV-positive or anything, is he?"  
"God, no. If he was, he wouldn't go out with anyone who didn't know or wasn't also positive. He's too nice."  
"Okay, so that's not it. Is he, like, not over his ex-girlfriend?"  
"It's not an old girlfriend he isn't over, it's Roger."  
"He dated Roger?"  
"No, they're both in total denial, but I'm planning to remedy that. I can't stand watching them inadvertently flirting with each other for much longer."  
"Ooh, a scheme. I'm in. Do you have a plan yet? Are you gonna lock them in a room together and not let them out until the admit how they feel? Are you gonna sit them down and say 'you love him, and you love him, too. Discuss'?"  
"Wow, you really enjoy doing stuff like this, don't you?"  
"Yeah, especially when it's this easy. On my first date with Mark, Roger was all he could talk about. Roger's band, Roger's obsession with 'Musetta's Waltz', Roger's tendancy to steal his screenplays and write obscene comments in the margins. It was kind of freaky."  
"So, do you want to help me?"  
"I'm in."

Two hours later, April and Maureen had a plan. It wasn't a all-out scheme, but they were both satisfied with the idea. They each wrote a letter to their respective boyfriends, explaining the situation. Maureen's letter was short, and it didn't take her long to write. April, however, having known Roger a whole lot longer than Maureen had known Mark, took a lot more time to write her letter.  
_  
__Dear Roger,__  
__ I'd like to start out by saying that I love you, and that's why I need to do this. I know you have feelings for Mark. Maybe even love him. I'm okay with that. You need to stop denying it. It'll be so much easier when you admit it to yourself and to him. I know that as you read this, you'll be thinking that I've got this all wrong, but stop trying to convince yourself. Stop trying to convince me. I see it in the way you got jealous when Mark brought Maureen to the loft. I see it in the way you steal his screenplays. I see it in the way you always mess up "Musetta's Waltz" just so he'll encourage you to go on. __  
__ If I continued our relationship, I'd be hurting both of us. Mentally and physically. I've considered doing drugs to make your denial easier on me. And I know if I actually did them, I'd end up getting you addicted as well. It sounds harsh but it's true. I don't want to make you a junkie, Roger. I don't want to make you sick. I just want to give you your happy ending, and that's what you'll get with Mark, a happy ending. Something I could never give you, Roger. Something I wish I could. But a second choice isn't a happy ending, Roger, and you know that as well as I do. __  
__ Maybe some day I'll regret giving up my first true love. But today's not that day. I'd only regret making that one true love's life miserable because he can't be with his. I don't want regret, Roger. There's only one thing I want and that's for you to be happy. You're happy with Mark, Roger. You're so happy. You two are perfect for each other. You are each other's happy ending. So take it, Roger. Take your happy ending. I can only hope that we can stay friends, so I can see just how happy you become. __  
__ Love Always,__  
__ April _


End file.
